If I Had A Million Dollars

  • I wouldn’t talk to any of you cunts.

  • Oy…I thought we really had something :[

  • We did till you aint call my ass in a month, uppity bitch. Think that ass is too good but u weren’t complainin when the lights were off.

  • id buy you a monkey

  • At least then it wouldn’t look so weird when I throw my poo. People would just think I was making him feel more comfortable. It’s common knowledge monkeys have poor self-esteem. That’s why they climb trees; poo down on all the ridicule. Common military tactic: hide in the trees and shit.

  • There were nine of us maaaan, were crossing the beach into the jungle. It was night time. All you could see was glowing eyes. maaaan they came outta the trees maaan, outta the trees. The intolerable stench of shit arised all around us, we were outnumbered, trapped. We were done for. I had so much shit in my eyes I couldnt see maaaan. I was forced to eat it so i could see. I saw my squad dying one by one, it was only jim, carlos, rodriguez, and i left. jim’s legs were blown RIGHT OFF, MAAN HE HAD KEEDS MAAN, 2 little girls. How was he gonna be there for them. I knew what i had to do, (danny’s going going ghost to stop all the ghosts from coming through[ignore]) i quickly ran to the remaining members of my squad, i told them we have to get out of there. I hoisted jim on to my back, he was bleeding out. We eventually made it, but to what extent maan. Only 3 and a half of us survived. People called me a hero for what i did, just know i am not a hero, dont call me that. A hero wouldve shit right there then at that moment, and wouldve returned fire. For what I have done i am nothing even close to a hero. God this was retarded, idk why i even did this make fun of it though plz

  • @e:

    God this was retarded, idk why i even did this make fun of it though plz

    No, you beautiful piece of shit

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  • @zombojoe:

    id buy you a monkey

    I iz not for sale!

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